Skip to content

Tag: Donald Trump

Soro Sókè Werey! Reactions trail Parosident Sai Baba’s statement

“Sai Baba is quick to address the press and issue statements on events occurring thousands of miles away, but to address the one in his Iginmu, Sai Baba has turned ghost worker. Since he has time to be issuing statement for America, let him tell us who ordered the Lekki toll gate massacre!?? #SoroSoke Werey!”

Leave a Comment

“Democracy has been taken hostage in America,” says Sai Baba

In related news, the Nigerian ministry of Foreign Affairs in a travel advisory issued on its website has warned citizens of the country to reconsider traveling to the United States, particularly to the Washington DC area, due to post-election violence and the imminent fear of a break down in law and order.

1 Comment

US Forces rescue ONE American hostage, Nigerian Military leaves WhatsApp group

The general, while addressing Pressmen on Sunday, described the SEAL Team Six operation as a sheer wanton wastage of US tax payers’ resources and has since called on the armed forces of other countries to equally condemn their action.

Leave a Comment

In defence of Sai Baba

For a 77-year-old man who had risked his life to partake in three major military coups; led the country as Head of State; ditched the khaki for the civilian garb; ran for Presidency three consecutive times before his triumph at the fourth attempt, this is undeserving. It is undeniable that the tall and suave Sai Baba is truly committed to Nigeria’s development. Come on, he could have retired to stay home and play with his grandkids but he didn’t, because of his undying love for the country.

5 Comments

The Antericans

“Where are these fucking men in ghost-white lab coats?” the king’s TV presenter voice boomed, disturbing the specialists working hard to find the cure to a novel virus. The king wasn’t smart, but he was the king anyway, so they left their work, and formed a semi-circle in front of him. “Took you long enough,” he said in that voice that hurt the ear.

Leave a Comment

‘Have your President call my President’ | Sonala Olumhense

“Those are just rumours, Excellency. Many of them are our friends, and they have told us they never did any such thing. It is just like Sani Abacha; he never looted anyone, that is just a name. But believe me, if you send us the ventilators, we will soon be curving the flat all over Nigeria.”

Leave a Comment

How many dollars per barrel is Qasem Soleimani worth?

I see how the White House, from the Secretary of States to the Defense Secretary, is trying so hard, interview after interview, to justify the assault on Iraq’s sovereignty and the assassination of Soleimani. It’s pitiful how much of a terrible job they are doing. For the first time since Trump became POTUS, this is the most selfless decision he has made, causing such a surge in oil prices, leaving every member of OPEC pleased and richer than the night before, this is an angle the White House should explore in defending the president’s action.

Leave a Comment

The Marlian Empire: A brief history on human history

The wars ended and Hafiz started a conquest. It would become the only bloodless conquest in the history of the human race. Within thirty years, Hafiz became the Supreme Charismatic Leader (an office created specially for him) controlling the United Nations. On Marlianry 5 2050, he changed the UN to No Battle Ground (NBG) and proceeded to create global peace through disarmament.

Leave a Comment

The Meme Resistance: How to stand against global oppression

The year is 3100 and memes have been banned. The Interplanetary Alliance (replaced the United Alliance, which replaced the UN) now sits in Lagos, Nigeria. The IA is an alliance of Humans (CEOs of the top one percent tech companies), Robots, and life forms from other planets.

1 Comment