The year is 3100 and memes have been banned. The Interplanetary Alliance (replaced the United Alliance, which replaced the UN) now sits in Lagos, Nigeria. The IA is an alliance of Humans (CEOs of the top one percent tech companies), Robots, and life forms from other planets.
The IA has focused over the years on elevating all life forms to the deus (God) level, devoid of emotions, sentiments, and the weaknesses that make organisms vulnerable to outbursts, war, and constant laughter. We live in a serious world now, and you’re either a part of it or you’ll be purged.
To be purged means to be uploaded to a server where your worst memories are played in a loop while putting your consciousness in REM state, so that you are present, unable to run away, and feeling all the mental torture at once.
Nobody makes it out of the purge with emotions. When you get out, the IA returns you to society, puts you on permanent surveillance, and ensures that you, or anyone close to you, are permanently rid of human emotions; especially the cackling sound humans make when they open their mouth in amusement and joy. They said in the 2000s they called it laughter.
Laughter, they said, was the most human thing for a long time. It was how people managed through depression. It was how people related in social circles. It was how people formed alliances, and ended up in private unions. It was shit. The world is more advanced now. Everything is based on logic. The basic human behaviour today is to be woke. There is no place for laughter here. We are made to live, and to do. Not to languish in the weaknesses that come with basic emotions like happiness.
But as all human history has recorded, there will always be deviants. Creatures who think they know better than society and try to fight it. In our case, we have the Meme Resistance. The meme is a stupid gesture in still or playback images that triggers laughter. What a mess!
The Meme Resistance is led by Eric Trump Jnr, great grandchild to Donald J. Trump, who was the epitome of the meme era. Orange, Chauvfefe, WWIII are some of the memes adduced to his era. It was in fact because of his reflex need to always make controversial social talks on an archaic social media platform called @Twitter that he levelled America’s position as the world’s most powerful country to a battleground for African political re-election campaigns. But this isn’t about Donald. This is about the Meme Resistance.
In Nigeria, the resistance is headed by the great-grandchild to a Nobel laureate in comical satire @Oli_Ekun; also taking his ancestor’s “Àgbà” title. Àgbà is the most feared Meme resistance leader. Just five years ago, he hacked into government servers and mass released a comical voiceover that made robots laugh, and visiting life forms giggle. It was unheard of.
This made the IA offer a seat at the council table for anyone who’s to help in the capture of Àgbà. It was an ally, the great-grandson to a former Twitter famous human, @Dehkunle who gave Àgbà out.
The IA has been silent on giving out the seat, as the woke people of the Universe have questioned the source of the betrayal. If he knew so much, then he must have been a part of it. This is definitely a ploy to get a member of the meme resistance into council, in order to take over.
While the IA has been silent on Dehkunle’s descendant, today we stand gathered to witness the purging of Àgbà. VR cams on our eyes, we all watched the live upload. All was smooth and fine, and Àgbà was uploaded successfully. But as the upload entered the 90th percentile. The system glitched, and Àgbà sent one last broadcast.
“Ko ni bàjẹ́ baby”, he said, before finally purging. The world smiled.