where sa-tyres never go flat
where sa-tyres never go flat
I had joined my neighbour at the drinking parlour the night before. He looked devastated, like one who was about to be drowned in perpetual sorrow. He was rarely like that, so I knew it had to be something serious. I quizzed him till he finally said something. Something that affected him, me, and every man in our community. He initially laughed at my colossal ignorance. ‘You no dey Facebook?’
Boys are angels. Men are God-sent. I understand how magnificent the male child is every time my lungs expand and contract. The male child is gratified and society knows why. They have to be sent to school, taught to make money and be go-getters. The male child from the day they are born are raised to believe they can have it all, they should want it all and above all, they can get it all.
God doesn’t make mistakes, at all. And Nigerians are proof of it. In His all-knowingness, He understood perfectly what being a Nigerian would entail, and on the Eighth day, while every other human specie had become ‘up and functioning’, He made Nigerians, with cement and a resilient spirit to absorb hardship, and melanin, lots of it, to absorb harshness from the sun
The fight against government oppression lives on social media, Igbo traders are dishonest yet hardworking, Yoruba women are cussers yet kind, Hausa merchants are dirty yet generous, Ijaw traders are partial yet trustworthy.
Take online courses. Only the ones that give signed certificates. You don’t have to have an interest in or even understand the course. It can also be a course you’d never need; just collect your certificate and post it on social media. Caption it growth. Remember the more the certificates you have, the better a person you are.
After today’s celebration, tell
those who are out to deflate the protruding bellies of lies of our
“sicknators” that the
bellies of our “politrickcians” are like salamander limbs; when you
cut them they regrow.
The COVIK-19 is a custom of the COVID-19 virus. In an attempt for the COVID-19 virus cells to survive and thrive in its newly found environment whose atmosphere is highly concentrated with corrupium (a gaseous constituent that makes its space fantastically corrupt) and other uncongenial elements, it undergoes certain cellular adaptations.
Leader’s pockets are the nation’s locket
where valuables must be safely kept
for the supposedly coming unknown generations-
Which deliberately coincidentally, are their own relations.
I’m well too, just that I’ve been ruminating over what you said the last time we talked: “I’m on WikiHow reading an article on straight-acting.” I vowed not to reply until I found you some help. To make this happen, I had to examine the trail of ash you’re leaving behind for people to see, and browsing your Facebook profile and your Medium articles on self-discovery, the bells started to ring: “This boy is CLEARLY gay! This boy is clearly GAY!”
A former good-for-nothing devil, fondly known as Ba Sheggy, has become washed of his countless sins after he recently joined the political party of angels, The T.A. Report gathered.
