where sa-tyres never go flat
where sa-tyres never go flat
Now, we will open the line for callers to contribute. The topic we have been discussing is: Ahead of the election tribunal judgement, what is your opinion? You already know the rules. Move away from your radio set. Do not use swear words. Remember, we are in the state of the ọmọlúàbí. And mention your name and where you are calling from. Hello, good morning.
At about 3:00 a.m., just before dawn on Wednesday, 15th of March, 2023, a chocolate-coloured old man, with a bald head, deserted beard and moustache, baggy face and fading eyes, stretches on his bed made of gold in his well-furnished master bedroom and begins a sleep talk that lasts for two hours. The white blanket that shields half of his body before now folds out over his uncontrolled stretch.
Nigeria is a vast land full of gullible people with no faith. It is where you are told salvation is free but you need to buy anointing oil and holy water, pastor’s stickers and even pay for your miracles. Yes, you have to pay for all of these because the Nigerian god blesses based on the measure you give.
Nigerians will accord you some respect when you go about with your bottle, sipping the water in bits. Never be in a hurry to drink everything at once, no matter how thirsty you are. When you are about to talk to a friend, open up and have a sip. Make sure there’s always at least a quarter of the contents left, at which point you can drop it inside your car. That is more honourable.
Even our prominent president reportedly set the pace in sign-a-thon. Apparently, to prove a point, Mr President hit the ground running by signing four bills in two weeks! The president deserves an accolade and a certificate of excellence as, perhaps, the first number one citizen to achieve this feat. Though a critic ridiculed the achievement by saying the bills are low-hanging fruits, I think it is deserving of a medal from no less than the GWR headquarters.
While JAMB vilifies our poor teenage protagonist, accusing her of parading falsified results, the girl herself presents a mysterious and intriguing piece of evidence—an alleged result format sent down from the heavens of academic bureaucracy.
Buhari became a walking world power. He personally toured UK’s health facilities to ensure they weren’t below the standard he established in Nigeria. This is why he sent Nigerian doctors abroad at some point to teach the the foreigners how to carry out the profession effectively.
By: Yusuf Adua “I have dreamt of this moment for a long time. To trend. A day when my little galloway will […]
Phase Eleven is generous to a fault like politicians during campaigns itchy for the people’s votes. The staff rarely harass or trouble its consumers for light bills and it is certain that there would be electricity during festive periods. Periodically, they supply ‘apology light’, which is to say they leave the electricity on for hours and hours until we begin to grumble.
Is it not just food? Is there anything wrong with giving food to someone you like and care about? My dear sisi ekos, there’s nothing wrong o, ko si wahala kan kan. All I’m saying is that to an Alajeun, you aren’t just being nice and caring to the boy you like. You’re his meal ticket, he is very much aware of whatever games he is playing with you. He is only in contact because you are his food bank, your contact is probably saved as “Priscilla Bukka,” “Ada Food,” “Zainab Canteen,” or maybe even “Olori Jeun Je Je.”
