… where sa-tyres never go flat
… where sa-tyres never go flat
Were you dumped or did you do the dumping? Do you want them back or do you never want to see them again? Are you happy, sad, or you’re just caught in between? It doesn’t matter; there’s a song for you.
Times are hard. Allocation is not enough. And, as a university administrator, you must balance your books. If you worry about how you are going to do that, worry no further: I’m here to help. Start with these five steps.
They toggle the power on and off as if it were a toy they were given to play with as children. At the NEPA office, they chant their slogan before restoring power, “You foolish people, we are about to turn on the light for you,” and when they shut it off again, another slogan resounds, “Back to sender, all your curses are not for us.”
When some lawyers start to behave recklessly and executives exchange dirty laundry in public, and we don’t see any decisive step to correct it, you will realise why Portable is a good fit for their conference. It’s the open season. Let Portable celebrate with the silks. Let Ìdààmú àdúgbò dance with ìdààmú àgbejoro. It’s the clown meeting the gown.
Nigeria is a vast land full of gullible people with no faith. It is where you are told salvation is free but you need to buy anointing oil and holy water, pastor’s stickers and even pay for your miracles. Yes, you have to pay for all of these because the Nigerian god blesses based on the measure you give.
Nigerians will accord you some respect when you go about with your bottle, sipping the water in bits. Never be in a hurry to drink everything at once, no matter how thirsty you are. When you are about to talk to a friend, open up and have a sip. Make sure there’s always at least a quarter of the contents left, at which point you can drop it inside your car. That is more honourable.
There is nothing more exhilarating than pitching for international opportunities, right? Well, hold on to your press passes and grab a pen because I’m about to lay out the hurdles that’ll make you question everything you thought you knew about the glamorous wanderlust-filled life of a reporter.
Even our prominent president reportedly set the pace in sign-a-thon. Apparently, to prove a point, Mr President hit the ground running by signing four bills in two weeks! The president deserves an accolade and a certificate of excellence as, perhaps, the first number one citizen to achieve this feat. Though a critic ridiculed the achievement by saying the bills are low-hanging fruits, I think it is deserving of a medal from no less than the GWR headquarters.
In this country, you are never short of bad days. Live here long enough and you’ll realise that you don’t even have to do anything to catch a bad day. It will fall on you like the Money and Banana that Davido promised Chioma. Take it from someone who’s had an immeasurable number of bad days. I’ve seen enough to write a book on it. But what we’re not going to do is sit and mope over bad days, no. We don pass that. What I will be showing you is how to survive one or a couple of bad days.
Commercial motorcyclists are notorious for driving without regard for their life. Well, it is because they have so many they can afford to be reckless, a new study now tells us.
