where sa-tyres never go flat
where sa-tyres never go flat
However, some countries and other international human rights organisations have raised concerns about free will and the principle of non-interference. According to the ambassador of a country in the Middle East, “While peace is beautiful, it is important to let the countries involved resolve their own issues. You can’t just pick up your phone, tweet and interrupt an issue without understanding the full context.”
Yes, things are hard; that’s undeniable. But if we ignore our empty stomachs and empty pockets, we can see that our country is actually better off, as our beloved Tinooboo said.
Massacres or genocides, nothing is happening in my country. In fact, I get so bored with the nothingness, I vacation every other month. Will I lie to you?
When people from the Middle Belt and the North Central complained, the political dogs accused them of attacking the President politically. Today, these same dogs are screaming that both Muslims and Christians are being killed. Wow, I thought the killings were political propaganda.
There’s no prestige in dying in Gwarimpa General Hospital. If you want a proper state burial, the type that pauses governance for 48 hours and halts businesses in the name of a public holiday, you must die abroad — ideally in London. That’s where the real state funerals begin. The mystery of flying out sick and returning only in a body bag allows the state to control the story.
In the beginning, there was earth. Then came the first Nigerian governor, who looked upon this earth and said, “Let there be road.” And behold, there was road. And it was good. For exactly seventeen days.
We are not like those places where a father rules from his thirties till his death and then hands over to his son. Our dictators here fuck you up nicely; they would put on a smile that would make you disbelieve the evils they do in secret.
It is often said that governance is about roads, security, and economic growth, but that is the thinking of mere mortals. True immortality is not only built with cement and policy; it is also constructed with plaques, marble signs, and rebranded signposts. A monument does not become national until it answers to a name worthy of national awakening, preferably in capital letters.
Of course, some “critics”, the usual people who don’t appreciate excellence in ego, have called it “sycophantic,” “tone-deaf,” and “grossly undemocratic.” Imagine! Just because we renamed a road or ten! These people clearly don’t understand that Nigeria is now a brand, and every brand needs consistency. Especially when the roads are not.
Two years ago, we welcomed His Excellency, President Bobo the Bold, into the sacred chambers of Aso Rock. A man of vision, they said. A builder who has built the best state amongst its contemporaries. A man of action, they proclaimed. And indeed, action we have seen, though perhaps not the kind we anticipated.
