Meet my country
By: Okebunmi Titoluwa Favour Hello! Meet my country Nigeria, We are the giant of Africa, Although, we are trying to plug the fruit of greatness from the tree that’s just…
Old things shall pass away…
The state’s better run like a business empire. Maybe renaming would do. For leaping productivity. The revolutionising Governor AbdulRahman might have forgotten to reach out to the House. He can visit the dam in the morn, hydro- plants in the noon and see some patients in the hospitals in the evening offering words of encouragement. The documents needing attention on his seats can sleep. The Deputy Governor could attend to them if he’s not attending a party member’s function.
My Lord, tell me where to keep your bribe│Niyi Osundare
My Lord; Please tell me where to keep your bribe. Do I drop it in your venerable chambers; Or carry the heavy booty to your immaculate mansion. Shall I bury it in the capacious water tank; In your well laundered backyard. Or will it breathe better in the septic tank? Since money can deodorize the smelliest crime.
Becoming a rich Nigerian graduate
Keep posting things like ’50 people will have N1m before the end of this month. To claim this type amen’. Wait and see the number of amens you will see as comments within an hour. Nigerians, it doesn’t matter the number of times they’ve gone across such post(s), they’ll still comment with amen hoping for a testimony. They love miracles. A Nigerian God blesses people who have faith. He blesses those who don’t work hard.
Our lord’s prayer
By: Ololade Akinlabi Ige Our lord who art on earth hallowed ought to be thy name but thy kingdom is a corrupt court in which our gavel sways. Thy injury-will…
Let the good works continue
Though it might look like our people are poor, internally, they have peace of mind and find their ways through their daily struggle for existence. This struggle does not in any way mean suffering. They just make sure they give the last drop of their sweat to make ends meet. This is what we encourage, hard work!
How to become a millionaire in Nigeria
By: Omoya Simult (Caveat: Please engage your sense of humour in reading this article. Sentences may have deeper meanings than what can be readily gleaned on the surface. Or maybe…
How to be American in a Nigerian skin
By: Ufuoma Bakporhe First, you really do not have to visit America. However, it is an added advantage if you do. Introduce yourself as an American or someone affiliated with…
UI appoints student vigilante leader as CSO, renames Abefele spiritual watchmen
With the mentioned efficient security measures and others planned but yet to be disclosed ones, she thus assured that “there is no cause to be alarmed; you can sleep soundly in the storm” as she, the master of the storm, is in the ship, they cannot be capsized.
How to be a Nigerian gay man
By: Obinna Tony-Francis Ochem Dear Nigerian gay man, have you ever thought about how to be a gay man in a homophobic country like Nigeria? A country where your human…
A certain Nigerian highway
By: Moghalu, Jennifer Chinwendu He threw his big, mango-shaped head back in satisfaction, heaved a heavy sigh and squared his shoulders as he made to take his seat adjacent to…
Where are Nigeria’s best brains?
Why will the best brains stay in the country full of opportunities and reward for success… opportunity to be a member of the world poverty capital nation and handsome rewards for undignified labour. Can’t you see how huge the prize and recognition for the best graduating students of our
Universities are? Presentation of a mug, two thousand five hundred naira is a bonafide reason for any reasonable student to face his studies as Baba is facing Nigeria, isn’t it?
For the South East Western Poles
By: Frances Ogamba If you live in the South East Western Poles of this large Black Country, you must watch out for when light clouds cloak the sun, or when…
Becoming a privileged Nigerian
An honest and practical guide to placing you at the big table of Nigerian relevance By: Mazpa Ekejiuba Ejikem Start off by becoming a man! It is the ticket to…
91 Million poor Nigerians call for being remanded by SSS to enjoy El-Zakzaky’s kind of large living
ABUJA — Nigeria’s 91.8 million poor people, the world’s highest, have sought a breakaway from their miserable condition. They have called for being kept in SSS detention like Ibrahim El-Zakzaky,…
Because you are alive
By: Funmilayo Obasa I At eleven years old, you find the tongue of your tutor between your lips, his fingers on your little buds, his words in your thighs. You…
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