Doctors, think out of the box!
Another breeze of discord has blown and unveiled a new contour in the rear-view of the medico-presidential chicken. News has it that a novel war of bickering has occurred between the ever-demanding resident doctors, and our very responsible, sensible, and admirable government.
Egbon Aruleba, how dare you insinuate Nigeria is a Marlian Republic?
In the aftermath of the small matter of Naira Marley’s flight from Lagos to Abuja and back, from the depth of oblivion you appeared on our airwaves to attack a gentleman who doubles as a president and a role model to many progressive and patriotic Nigerians. That was not just it. You went on to make the absurd insinuation that there may be elements of the Marlian World Oder (MWO) movement in the esteemed Buhari government.
Calm down! Our government can’t multitask.
Our government is busy, the health sector is working to fight this pandemic since we have a new saviour Boss Mustapha. The religious sectors will not come out as they are on praying mountains interceding on behalf of the nation, since it is our iniquities that has brought this plague on us. The security officials are too busy in the war against Covid-19 since it is no longer a health matter but a matter of security now.
Ganduje monopolises corruption in Kano, brags of PhD in Pocketing Dollars
“Let me state clearly without any equivocation that anyone of you who engages in corrupt practices will be thrown out of office. There can’t be two kings in a kingdom. I have made frantic efforts to reach the zenith in corrupt and shady dealings; particularly, in pocketing dollars. Therefore, I urge you all to accord me the exclusive right as the Sarkin Dollars of Nigeria,” he said.
The Nigerian government’s guide to road maintenance
There are some silly countries, such as Canada, that have created online forms and helplines just for people to complain about potholes. Every year, the city of Toronto alone spends millions of dollars repairing hundreds of thousands of potholes and then—wait for it—also gives progress reports to the people about how many potholes they’ve massacred. Who does that? Aren’t they aware that potholes are citizens with fundamental human rights? Don’t they know they are a necessary evil that deserve to be treated with love, care, and respect?
Why government should ban Big Brother Naija
I think MURIC (Muslim Rights Concern) has a point in saying Big Brother Naija should be banned. This is an issue of national emergency if you ask me. BBNaija is not only distracting us from tackling Fulani herdsmen and corruption in Nigeria; it also infringes on the religious right of some peace-loving Muslims.