Punocracy

… where sa-tyres never go flat

From Our Allies

Ganduje monopolises corruption in Kano, brags of PhD in Pocketing Dollars

“Let me state clearly without any equivocation that anyone of you who engages in corrupt practices will be thrown out of office. There can’t be two kings in a kingdom. I have made frantic efforts to reach the zenith in corrupt and shady dealings; particularly, in pocketing dollars. Therefore, I urge you all to accord me the exclusive right as the Sarkin Dollars of Nigeria,” he said.

Read more
From Our Allies

The parable of the pothole

As the driver approached it, the pothole cried out with a loud voice, “Who are you, driver?” Our driver responded as fast as the economic growth rate of Nigeria with, “I am Muhammed from Bornu state.” To my amazement, the pothole closed up leaving us with a smooth road to drive through. I asked the driver what just happened, he said, “Walahi, it’s because I’m from Bornu. What affects other Nigerians doesn’t affect us. Some basic problems other people encounter don’t come near us.”

Read more
From Our Allies

One Lagos, many troubles

Hope it didn’t move your office from CMS to V.I? If you don’t know, please confirm before you head out to work. In these times, we have to sympathise with Lagos people. One governor was removed because he didn’t carry people along in line with the master’s masterplan. Thank God, flood will carry everyone along now. Or should we say Lagosians got what they deserve? –— a man of the people.

Read more
From Our Allies

When courts become degree-awarding institutions… (II)

That decision of the Presidential Election Petition Tribunal will surely reduce perjury, forgery, corruption, false results being tendered. It will increase the number of degree holders in Nigeria. It will increase the number of “graduates ”. It will increase Nigeria’s “literacy” level. It will make getting degrees very easy. It will ease Nigerians of the stress of sitting for useless exams –WASSCE, SSCE, UTME etc. It will help to depopulate the already populated tertiary institutions. And it will help put Nigeria on the world map in terms of education.

Read more