… where sa-tyres never go flat

From Our Allies

Palliatives? No. SUVs, Yes!  

Palliatives? No. SUVs, Yes!  

By: Quadri Yahya

It is unacceptable to be doling out plenty of palliatives to the masses when they deserve Sports Utility Vehicles. We cannot justify giving one thing to one group of Nigerians and something else to another. Nigerians deserve the best things in life.

It would be a great injustice if a member of a privileged group gets an SUV while the less privileged are only given palliatives.

In the same vein, if a person can own three Land Cruisers and two Prados, why can’t the people equally have SUVs? Think about it! But first, we must begin with the people’s representatives. Eventually, it will go round.

Our current state does not prove that we are not blessed to ride in SUVs.

We are not living in penury, nor are we desperate to pay off our token debts. What some people call poverty is just an economic condition where some 133 million people have food but no mouth to put it. What some puppet experts call high debt is just a penny for chicken feed. What others call insecurity on the roads — where we intend to ostentatiously joyride our SUVs while minding our business — are just minor incidents. What naysayers describe as terrorism can be settled overnight once we mount our SUVs to the front line. What some traders and households lament as inflation is just a figure that can be rounded up. What the Bureau de Change calls unfriendly foreign exchange is absolutely friendly. What some schoolboys and girls decry as high tuition are simply charges on bank transactions. 

So, what problems stop us from tossing a few coins in return for swanky SUVs?

Why SUV of all cars, you ask.

The answer is on the road. The roads are tarred and very smooth, and an SUV is the best car to explore them, regardless of the outing.

Another reason is that an SUV is an automobile designed to fight poverty and insecurity; it can impress poverty and restore peace before a parliamentary session ends.

SUVs are also great cars to distribute palliatives to the GRAs nationwide.

Finally, bear in mind that people don’t care about the price; they just want their well-deserved and desired SUVs.

5 1 vote
Article Rating

Share this post

Wanna leave a reply?

Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x