Punocracy

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Nigeria Airways of blessed memory

Nigeria Airways of blessed memory

By: Olamide Francis


It’s been more than four months since they told us Nigeria Airways will fly. Did someone borrow the wings?

In fact, the imaginary airline motto was: Bringing Nigeria closer to the world. I like it because it’s perhaps the only word of truth that’ll ever come out from their uncontrollably lying tongues. It seems their conscience will not let them rest; so they had to unconsciously voice out the truth. They know that Nigeria is undoubtedly and incredibly far from the world; hence, the motto.

But is it an airline that’ll take Nigeria closer to the world? I suppose the systems and institutions in saner climes are just for decoration; and their various national carriers are the ones enabling them to keep up with the increasing pace of global industrialisation. No wonder our leaders — with all their constant journey to the place — go on pilgrimage to saner climes with their eyes wide open, seeing clearly, like a wooden carved image. They return to Nigeria with plentiful conference materials, but always seem to leave the sense of implementation at the airport.

It is abrupt monstrosity and a parade of callousness at its maximum not to let a sleeping dog lie or a dead man rest in peace. Nigeria Airways is dead, but they won’t let the innocuous airline rest in peace. They still went about digging his grave in a bid to resurrect him. They didn’t even look for a miracle worker with proven track records of resuscitating things for the resurrection project; they chose Bubu, the messiah that’s always unaware. There and then, I knew the airline would die again. For it is appointed for it to die twice; after death is yet another death.

But wait, did they use Nigeria Airways to retrieve again? Because we know that some cultures in Nigeria can throw party for the success of a party they just finished throwing. You know how Nigerians will borrow funds for a full blown funeral ceremony of their great great-grandfather who died in the 19th century. They’ll say, “We didn’t have money when he died. Now we’ve made money. We have to celebrate him.”

This must be the strategy that the Nigerian airways resurrection team employed: “Let’s organise a fresh burial ceremony for the airline and use the burial funds to buy real estate in Dubai.”

It could also be that the project was too big for the Messiah to handle. You know, a dead stuff since 2003. It must have been stinking or rotten and the unaware Messiah couldn’t stress his brain to cook up creative ideas. You can’t give what you don’t have. If he transfers it to his cabinet community, it’ll still be futile; oversabi can be worrying them. So, he who fights and runs away will live to fight another day: this was what the messiah did.

Meanwhile, we’ve already paid $55 million to the funeral event planners, and God knows how much the Bahrain logo designers received. All wasted and looted.

There is no way Nigeria airways will resurrect again. The horrible things they made his eyes behold when he was alive was awful. In fact, the same people trying to resurrect him now were part of those who murdered him in cold blood. They made him donate all his blood to the extent that he gave up the ghost. He initially collapsed in the 1980s, before he finally died in 2003. His autopsy report says he died of an overdose of mismanagement, corruption, nepotism, low revenue generation, regular inflation of contract sum, and kickbacks for contract awards.

The causes of his death are still very much prevalent, but in a more toxic form, yet, they were planning to resurrect him again. They said Nigeria Airways will fly by December 2019. I guess they’ve used it’s wings as  collateral for one of those loans they intend to collect. Or they’re not aware it’s already 2020. Iranu yii sha!

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