I am a fellow of integrity and honest to the core. I operate with fairness to everyone who subscribes to my mentorship, follows my guidance, and trusts my decisions in matters of academic acumen and brilliance. The best part? I can’t be cross-checked or reviewed by anyone. My years of existence have earned me the authoritative license to determine who passes or fails.
Since 1952, my mission has been to withhold “qualitative and reliable educational assessment,” which I achieve by conducting exit examinations for candidates across five English-speaking countries of West Africa (Ghana, Nigeria, Sierra Leone, and Gambia).
I employ ad-hoc workers and pay them five per cent of my income to mark entrusted African examination papers. For the record, I ensure they are university graduates with discharge certificates. They may just happen to be experts whose main occupations are tailoring, carpentry, masonry, and so on.
In the last few weeks, slanders have been hurled at me. I released the results of 1,969,313 candidates, and only 753,642 (38.32%) obtained credits and above in at least five compulsory subjects, including Mathematics and English Language. Shouldn’t I be commended for this amazing feat? It might be lower than last year’s figures, but to me, it is progress. Our efficient systems are only providing evidence for what we already instinctively know: the children are getting dumber.
Yet, I was blamed. Those I served came at me hollering, spewing curses, claiming my food could have been delicious if I had added one or two ingredients. They say the 2025 results are the worst in my 73 years. So, I showed empathy and gave the blame to the network. I called it “technical issues” to be amended within 24 hours, after which I only made small adjustments to the results to let sleeping dogs lie.
The system is worn out. It needs standard infrastructure, well-trained and seasoned teachers, and a serene environment — not chaotic examination scenes like the English paper on Wednesday, 28th May 2025, where students wrote by candlelight at night due to delays and poor malpractice control.
But don’t blame me too much. I must keep the provisions I got from you, the examination fees, to sustain myself till next time. The revenue I got covers my costs: exam materials, logistics, item-writing workshops, and payment to examiners and supervisors. The government has no hand in this. You should check my website, waecnigeria.org, to see how well we are spending your money. Blame the government that funds itself and leaves me to survive on exam registration fees, partial subventions, and scraps from an endowment fund meant for educational capital projects and awards.
The author is on Facebook as Abiodun Amubikaun.
